The boys have really changed Beth’s and my life in many ways and this past week brought one of those experiences. Finding a good place to cut our boys’ hair is always an effort as it hasn’t been easy to find, neither in Bloomington, MN nor on the main street of Gansbaai, South Africa. One of the things most of us take for granted is that we can just walk into our neighborhood barbershop and have our hair cut. This notion was pretty much shattered after Beth and I adopted our boys, as my barber cuts mostly straight hair and does not necessarily do a good job with the boys’ hair. I can still remember when I first arrived in the United States eleven years ago and walked into the barbershop of the neighborhood mall in Houston, TX where I lived, looking for a haircut. I eventually found a barbershop, but was asked to come back later, as the African American barber told me that the person who cuts straight hair was out on lunch. It was a strange feeling being asked to come back later because of my hair type, but in all honesty I must admit that I did not grasp the struggle other ethnic groups have just getting a hair cut in a predominant culture other than their own.
Luckily for us we resolved our challenge in Bloomington as we found a wonderful barber from Ethiopia in the Midway area of Saint Paul at the “One Nation Barbershop”. What a great experience it is for the boys to see pictures of hairstyles fit for their hair type and to have someone who can cut it for them. Still I think what the boys like most about getting their hair cut there is going over to our favorite Ethiopian restaurant, Fasika, afterwards for some excellent Ethiopian food.
Well, this past week I had to renew my search to find a barber for the boys in Gansbaai. Being in South Africa you will think it is easy, but I was wrong. Nowhere in Gansbaai’s downtown area will you find a place that is able to cut the boys’ hair Luckily for us, my parent’s housekeeper took us to a barbershop, if you can call it that according to our standards, in the backyard of a house in a neighborhood called Masekane. This is a predominantly black neighborhood on the outskirts of Gansbaai.
It was quite an experience driving into the neighborhood at about 4:30 in the afternoon seeing people coming home from work, chickens walking everywhere, dogs running loose in the streets, and kids playing soccer. As you drive down the streets you can hear and see people visiting in front of the small homes occupied by their extended families and see many informal small stores.
As we stopped in front of a house there was a little boy playing in the yard and a teenager who was taking down the laundry as the sun was setting with the cool air coming in from the ocean. Then a man came out with his blue overalls, which workers wear in South Africa, and opened a small wooden house in his backyard behind his house. Inside was not much; just a wobbly wooden bench, a poster of different hair styles each with a number by it, hair clippers, scissors, combs, and two mirrors.
With the boys it is always a fight over who will get their hair cut first; however, this time it was Endalkachew’s turn to go first. In his broken English, Daysmond, the barber and part-time worker at the local fish processing plant, asked me how I wanted the boys’ hair cut. After looking at a chart on the wall I picked #21 for Endalkachew and 18 for Alazar.
Daysmond did a really good job cutting my sons’ hair as he was very gentle and according to them did not hurt them by pulling their hair (like their dad does when he does it at home!). After Endalkachew was done he needed to go to the bathroom. Ashamed, Daysmond apologized to me, as he had no bathroom. When we were all done I paid him and he was so very thankful and grateful for the money he received. We greeted and shook hands and again he apologized for not having a bathroom for us to use.
As we left Masekane we did it with profound peacefulness; the shadows of the evening increased and the the sound of people visiting and kids playing became louder as more and more people came home from work. Thanks to my sons, I experienced a slice of South Africa that I never knew exists and the gratefulness of a barber getting $10.00 for cutting two boys’ hair.
This morning we were privileged to be a part of the dedication of a facility for the care of the elderly in the Blompark community near Franskraal, where Dries’s parents live. The Sorg Sentrum, or care center, was the result of the collective efforts of MANY people and organizations: land donated by one woman, municipal officials who worked to rezone the area, county officials who helped design the building, local people who were able to earn an income doing construction, members of the business community who contributed funds, and members of the community at large who donated furnishings for the rooms and pledged their time to help maintain the rooms. Oak Grove, for our part, contributed in excess of $40,000, the major portion of the construction funds for this project.
It was humbling for us to sit with the elderly people, the oumas and oupas, and to know that we have had such a hugely positive impact on their lives. For those few moments, we got to share in the excitement of being part of this community. 
